Learning to ballroom dance (Partner Dance) is a multi-faceted skill. Many dancers, new dancers in particular, focus a lot of initial energy on the academic aspects of Partner Dancing – learning certain moves/figures and combinations. While useful, that narrow focus can obliterate your mutual awareness of your dance partner!

Good Dancers

Briefly, a Good Dancer is a welcome addition to any social dance scene, even though (s)he may not be the most skilled dancer.  Good Dancers must be aware of the etiquette of partner dancing in a social setting.

Knowing how to manage personal space – where your hands go, how close you dance to someone else – as well as how to behave toward other dancers and dance partners when you attend a social dance, is a very important part of demonstrating that you are a respectful dancer, a Good Dancer. Learn more about social dance etiquette.

Just as importantly, Good Dancers are the ones who do not correct their partners and do not try to teach complicated moves/concepts (or anything at all) at social events.  They are not necessarily the ones with the flashiest moves.  They are the ones who are able to make even brand new dancers comfortable enough to have a great time dancing!

What does it mean to “teach at” someone?

It is the practice of correcting your social dance partner while dancing (instead of while practicing, or even better, letting a teacher do the correcting). It is the assumption that your partner — and not you — must have done something wrong if the move didn’t turn out as you intended.

My only exception for correcting your partner on the dance floor (or even while anywhere at a social dance) is if that person is hurting you. Hurting also includes making you feel uncomfortable or creeping you out in some intangible way.

Being injured (or being creeped out) is not a part of social dancing. If someone is hurting you or making you feel uncomfortable, you are well-justified in telling that person. Clearly. Bluntly. Directly. “You are hurting me” or “Your body is too close to me”.

If that person is unwilling or unable to stop hurting you (or stop creeping you out), then walk away from them. Yes. Right in the middle of the dance floor. Walk away. No apology. There is nothing embarrassing about enforcing your boundaries. Just walk away.

It may seem harsh, buy why should you put up with someone who is unwilling to be a Good Dancer?